ok so

I've been hiding a phone from my legal guardians (which aren't my parents btw), and they just recently found it. So one of my guardians decides to go through my ENTIRE ROOM, thinking I'm hiding every other thing from her like drugs or weapons. And in the process, she rips my bedding from my bed and throws it aside, she moves my mattress to a completely different spot, she takes out my shoe bin and my toy bin and she dumps them both out, then she goes up into my closet (I haven't been up there in a while) and she grabs EVERYTHING that was up there. Throws it down onto the ground. THENN she goes to my art bin by my bed. She dumps it all out and goes through everything. While she's doing that, she finds the papers I would vent in and stuff. She reads them and goes "You wanna kill yourself that bad, huh? Well, you can move out and do that, I don't care." I was in shock. I can NOTT believe she would ACTUALLY ENCOURAGE me to kms. So then she just keeps going with random shit like "You wanna move out and kys? Move out and do it. You wanna move out and get raped? Do it, I don't care." and I'm just standing there like 'What? Where did this come from??' and then she just hops into this random rant that's all like "You know that's how your brother was made? You mom was raped? You know I was raped?" and I was just like thinking to myself like 'I don't care I don't give a shit no one gives any fucks' and so then she's finished with everything, she stands in the doorway and just goes "Your brother knows I'm doing this, by the way, so this isn't just me being like 'You're a cunt'." I just stood there, choking on my tears. Then she goes "You have one hour to pick all of this up." (mind you there is now a GIANT mess in my room (it would take longer than an hour to pick up)) and then she just leaves. So I'm just sitting there against my bed, bawling my eyes out because I don't know what to do. I cry for about 5 minutes before I start to pick up, and (a little time skip) after dinner, she makes me clean the ENTIRE kitchen, put away and wash dishes, wipe the counters and table, sweep, vacuum, and take out the trash and recycling. So when I'm done, all she does is give me a small bag of m&ms and sends me to bed. With nothing but a book to help me fall asleep. I would be lucky enough if she even lets me read still after all that.
...
I love life.
Thanks a bunch if you actually read all that