I'm happy with my art I swear,but I don't belive that everyone I come across actually thinks I'm really good at art, idk maybe I'm just self-deprecating for no reason. I just don't have much reason to belive it when it comes from literally everyone man.

I'm putting alot of trust in someone right now, who has previously broken my trust several hundred times, and I really hope this cycle doesn't keep repeating over and over, because I genuinely care for them, alot, but they keep messing up and it's really been damaging me emotionally, I've been a wreck even tho I bottle my emotions, and don't tell me it's bad to do so, because i already know, and don't care because to make everyone happy like I've set out to do, you have to at one point or another set their happiness before your own, and I belive I'm a decent bit happy, but I just can't seem to find me staying happy for a while with this certain "trusted" person, I'm scared of getting so upset that I lash out and ruin our relationship because they are honestly all I have, I have my family, and I love them, but It's not the same as this certain person, it's different, and I sorta emotionally rely on that person, because i honestly don't have any real friends, no offense to Wormboy and Astral, you two are still cool people, but I honestly don't know if you're my friends because our talking is inconsistent and the relations feel unnatural, if I ever lose this person, do not contact me because I will only mope and cry about losing them, I love them dearly, more than words can describe but they keep throwing me onto an emotional roller coaster and making me go until I vomit, it's so tough to deal with, I do not want to hurt them, because they honestly don't deserve it, but they have hurt me so much, she's crumbling the paper (me) and she has attempted to uncrumble the paper (sorry) and it doesn't even really work, the marks are still so visible, I do not know what to do man, I gotta end my rant, no one's here anyways haha, ciao